Bobo Fresh

a (re)newal

2012-01-04T00:59:00.001-05:00

So, why not start again, a couple of years later. Maybe it will help me, if nothing more, than to begin writing again. So this time, I'll write first about the things I'm hoping to do in the upcoming semester:

1) move from temporary to tenure-track job

2) join the SDC as an Associate Member

3) renew my membership with VASTA

4) move at least $1,000 closer to living debt-free

I am hoping to keep this list small, manageable, and trackable.

performing the art

2008-07-07T16:47:00.001-04:00

The stoic, unfeeling little hero in me gets TWO FOR FLINCHING.

Guys are terrified or being called gay, because they don't really understand it, and are also terrified of being called feminine.

GUYS AREN'T SUPPOSED TO: be sweet, weak, or vulnerable. They should not cry, display emotion, or lose control.

GUYS ARE SUPPOSED TO: think they're strong, think they're independent, think they're masculine. They are encouraged to "act like a man," "fight it out," and "toughen up."

IF YOU SHOW YOUR FEELINGS, YOU'RE A FAG.
REJECT ALL THINGS CONSIDERED FEMININE.
GUYS ARE SUPPOSED TO HAVE SEX PREMATURELY.

The unwritten BOY CODE goes something like this:

1. Do not express your whole wide range of emotions. Keep your emotional pendulum as still as possible.
2. Although you should try, you will never fulfill your dreams or destiny alone.
3. There is a very narrow band of acceptable male and masculine behavior. It is not written or published, and you'll just know when your behavior is unacceptable.
4. All attempts to break free from the strictures and stereotypes of acceptable masculine behavior will be met with teasing, shaming, and public ridicule.
5. DO NOT BE THE REAL BOY THAT YOU ARE. HE IS INCOMPLETE.
6. You should be concerned about your fitness and the prowess of your body.
7. Boys can be a bully, be violent, or abuse drugs or alcohol as long as they maintain a cool, impenetrable veneer.
8. When the time comes, boys should sacrifice what is genuinely loving, caring, and affectionate, in order to be a man.
9. You will never amount to much of anything if you cry in front of others.
10. To protect your vulnerability, learn to cruelly tease, bully, and fight with others; exhibit physical strength and force, by any means possible, over other boys.

BE ROUGH.
BE TOUGH.
DON'T CRY.
DON'T BE SAD.

Stress... Makes a strong argument for Beachfront Property

2008-06-20T15:45:00.001-04:00

Stress: It's Worse Than You Think - Yahoo! Health

Stress has become so endemic it is worn like a badge of courage. Stress is the psychological equivalent of ragweed. Once the body becomes sensitized to pollen or ragweed, it takes only the slightest bloom in spring or fall to set off the biochemical alarm that results in runny noses, watery eyes, and the general misery of hay fever. Unfortunately, when stresses become routine, the constant biochemical pounding takes its toll on the body; the system starts to wear out at an accelerated rate. The biochemical onslaught chips away at the immune system, opening the
way to cancer, infection, and disease. Hormones unleashed by stress eat
at the digestive tract and lungs, promoting ulcers and asthma. Or they
may weaken the heart, leading to strokes and heart disease. "Chronic
stress is like slow poison,"

Rockin' and Rulin'

2008-04-28T09:49:00.002-04:00

This cracks me up. Never does take much.

YMCA

2008-04-22T15:58:00.001-04:00

Okay, this is funny. Source: http://presscue.com/node/28368

Seriously...

2008-04-22T10:41:00.001-04:00

Everyone is talking about it, but seriously.... $5.00 will literally get me 1.5 gallons of gas. That means, driving the Spy Mobile, (at 27 miles to the gallon), that a three hour car ride to visit my folks will cost $40.00 in gasoline, round rip. Really? That's kind of ridiculous. Thank god I'll be walking or bussing to work once it gets nice. I can't believe $3.50 a gallon in Blacksburg.

Asshat in the white house needs to go. Bring reform to petrol!

Shake that Ass

2008-04-21T15:04:00.001-04:00

I dunno, but my head hurts. I couldn't control the spinning.
Pretty mesmerizing.

The Right Brain vs Left Brain test « Just Me

Bauer Himself

2008-04-17T15:12:00.001-04:00

So this is my car. I am a Secret Spy. Last night, I pulled up right to the gas pump, got out of my car and paid for exactly one-dollar of gasoline. Then I pumped it into a little can and drove away. I think that if I weren't white, I might have had the F.B.I. at my house. But then again, maybe not. We don't racially profile in the good old U.S. of A.

House Buying... Credit Flossing...

2008-04-17T11:32:00.001-04:00

There so many errors on our credit report it's scary. Seriously, fixing this stuff is almost a part-time job. I hope we don't fight about it at all. It can be difficult, I know and completely frustrating. I don't know what to do. It seems that I can't buy a house because I got student loans to pay. Wow. That's scary.

And the tides shift quickly...

2008-04-15T17:57:00.001-04:00

So on Monday morning, my partner and I were renting our house. We love our house. We love making a life together. Then, yesterday afternoon, the landlords e-mailed us to say that they were wanting to list it this spring... Jump to this afternoon: a mortgage broker is running numbers, getting us pre-qualified so we can buy it. Looks like I will definitely be posting to my blog more. We'll be dumping and scraping together every penny so that we can have enough in the bank to actually buy it. How exciting. Lots of time at home doing home remodeling projects. Painting and nesting together. That's pretty cool...

To amend an earlier post, I've still got a sense of humor (and a pretty good one at that!) but I'm much less happy-go-lucky, fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants now that I'm madly in love. I seem to have done ten to fifteen years of growing up in the last year. Packing in the maturity process has been good for me (in hindsight) and not all that difficult, but there are times that I do miss my incredible ability to make fart jokes, moon people that stand still long enough, and find humor in all things poo related.

But again, don't get me wrong - farts... still funny. See, check it out. Told ya so.

My biggest worry (not a gripe)

2008-04-09T15:31:00.001-04:00

So healthcare. It's on everyone's tongue, but I really don't think anyone does anything about it. Not practically. I spent months on the phone learning that I have to exhaust my "COBRA" options before I am eligible for the amazingly high premium of $1200 a month. Currently, its $700 a month. I make too much money to get free or subsidized health care. It's been suggested that I just take a less-paying job to make me eligible. But you know something, that to me is the biggest part of the problem with the system. Reward (free healthcare) people for NOT doing their best to contribute to society.

I don't mind paying for healthcare, but should it cost more than rent? Seriously. So, I've added a PAYPAL button to my blog page. If you're feeling generous, I'll make you something and send it to you. With more good karma than you could imagine.

Pumping New Life...

2008-04-09T01:39:00.001-04:00

So, I'm sitting here in front of my mac, which of course, I love. I've just added ScribeFire to my Firefox for blog posting, with total hope that I might revive my blog. For a while there, I was a pretty regular poster on a LiveJournal, but I sort of fell off the earth with it. I probably spend close to nine or so hours a day in front of a computer - either this one or my big old honkin' work machine which is unfortunately running vista...

Anyway, perhaps ScribeFire will boost my posting frequency.

Who knows...
I'm going back to watching Into the Wild. I don't think I have many readers.
I'm also nowhere near as funny as I once was.

I think it's because I'm in love.

ROGUE 08

2008-02-27T00:05:00.000-05:00

Relationships

2008-02-21T22:22:00.002-05:00
I suppose, above all else, I'm lucky to have the difficulties that come with learning in a relationship. It sure beats loneliness. I also suppose that I'm pretty darn lucky that I've got a man that's a done deal. 100% forever. What I don't know so much about, is how to make relationships work. I mean, I've always heard they're difficult, but I don't know that I've ever had to work at them quite so much. Not only my relationship with College Pour Mark, but also with my boss, my friends, my family. It's not easy watching your father's sanity slowly slip away until he's the shell of the man he once was. Although, in some ways it is a bit cathartic, as I don't see what was so scary about him. I do know that I am a good man. And that I have a good man. And that, oh man, is enough.

Denoument

2008-02-15T14:27:00.003-05:00

I can read.

I can write.

I can think.

I can do.

I just want to live. Live. Live. Live.

(Sero)convert

2008-02-11T05:28:00.002-05:00

Where are you, my brother? Miasma.
My mask, my comfort has fallen and
my face is flecked with raspberry hairs.

You are hot, orangey-chocolately spice and
I can smell you yearning through the amyl scented air.
I imagine you dancing around the fires of my desire,
kicking cones and tiny embers.

So I will wait for you beside the boiling fires of my tainted sensuality.
And wait for you to come and save me from self-mendacity.

And then we will sit, and cackle through greasy, shiny lips
and I'll pick the burrs from your soft, tan feet. Bokumaru.

Living Green

2008-02-08T09:17:00.000-05:00
The way I see things, "living green," or "going eco-friendly" is the right thing to do. Granted, I'm not one to become a "Eco-Nazi" about it, but if I sit for a few moments, I can see where the good comes from living more earth-friendly than I currently live. Yes, we recycle - we even reduce and reuse. We compost, we do our part - but I get the sneaking suspicion that "our part" is still not enough - so, in my mind, it has become a sort of game... I constantly am thinking - can I do this in a more eco-friendly way? It's actually quite interesting. And for now, it's a good way to live my life.
The measure
of a man,
therefore, most
certainly can be
how eco-friendly he is.

1040, W2, W4, and nothing's EZ...

2008-02-07T16:04:00.000-05:00
I need a hefty tax-return for the following reasons:

1. The government has enough of my money.
2. Landlords need deposits and rent, which are late.
3. The Jetta needs a new clutch.
4. Pay fines (I fuck up every once in awhile, big surprise).
5. The Pussy Wagon has a bad O2 sensor.
6. Finish paying off the vet bill from dog's leg amputation.
7. So I can get to Fresno for Rogue 08
8. Blood draws, lab work, and pharmacy pills aren't cheap for the uninsurable.
9. I am almost out of V8 juice, which is the most economical way to get my daily recommended servings of vegetables.
10. It'd be nice, for once, to walk into a pub and not worry about having enough to pay the tab.

Clarity

2008-02-07T11:25:00.000-05:00
Encountering Amy Winehouse on the iTunes shuffle this morning (alone in the office, nonetheless), during the tail end of a two-week sinus infection is my kinda clarity. Almost as great as oil pulling (I shit you not!) -- I wish I discovered this years ago.

The Mark of a Man

2008-02-03T12:04:00.000-05:00
Mainly, what defines a "man," is not what he is, but what he isn't.
A man does not cry.
A man does not play with dolls.
A man does not wear dresses.
A man does not treat animals like Michael Vick (whose dogs are doing okay).

2008-02-02T23:07:00.001-05:00

Myths and Masculinities
a performance tapestry
written, directed, and performed by
j. nick dickert

Secret Agent
Superstar
Meanderer
Shit-Starter

You know the feeling you get sometimes when you want to jump out of your skin before you explode? Like your bones are dancing and you want to run around and do something naughty just to do it because you’re not sure if you’re alive? Yeah, that’s me all the time. All the time.

2006-10-23T20:31:00.000-04:00
This was the BEFORE.

2006-10-23T20:29:00.000-04:00
This is the apartment AFTER THE PAINT JOB - THE FINISHED PRODUCT.

My Mysterious Skin

2006-09-30T14:49:00.000-04:00
I just finished watching Mysterious Skin and have been totally moved as a man, as an artist, and as a human being. It's pretty amazing - creepy and transgressive - telling a pretty amazing story of queerness. The look really establishes mood - its apparent the filmmaker, like me, comes from the margins. However, this film did make me squirm quite a bit (any art that produces a visceral reaction in me is worth my time), which is why I think I like the film so much.

The acting is pretty spectacular - and the filmmaker monopolizes on the talent of his ensemble cast. The overhead camera angles during a particular gritty moment of oral sex, is spellbinding as Joseph Gordon-Levett breathes, in one long shot, an entire orgasm-- providing the viewer with a sense of voyerism.

In addition, the visual imagery of spilled cereal - is a haunting momement of childhood transgression - and visually reminsicent of Jackson Pollack's work - the fruit loops and sugar pops pouring over the face of the young man edited with a catalogue quick cut images of faces of late 70s porn stars juxtaposes the intersection of transgression for me - the moment of the "good little boy."

Furthermore, the early years in the lives of the men in the story are told around T-Ball. Which spellbinds me. Again, another connection to my own work in masculinity and gender identity. I love it when I can see art that feeds my art and stimulates my mind.

I'm in awe - this film had been reccomended to me several times - and I've even had it from netflix.com several times, but I never got around to seeing it. I'm glad I saw it now - at this moment in my life - during the final run of Good Little Boys. It's a nice conclusion to a piece of art that I've enjoyed having in my life.

2006-09-07T19:58:00.000-04:00
I was surprised when the Illinois Republican Party called today and asked for my opinion. I gave it to them, of course I was a smart ass.

Hubba Hubba

2006-09-02T02:01:00.000-04:00
Tahlequah, Oklahomo 09/02/06

Whee! Indeed!
Oh who, oh who could that man be?
He inquired about the show,
then he cocked his head, "what is it about?"
He twinkled at me. I saw it.
I gasped on the inside.
And smiled.
I twinkled back as he asked it if was any good.
Then he asked about upcoming auditions.
Our twinkes intermingled as he wheffted by the lobby as the first lines came.

Namaste.

Top Ten

2006-08-25T15:50:00.000-04:00
In response to Fold Me Up's question about what's fun to do in Oklahoma on myspace, I offer my Top-ten list of fun things to do in Oklahoma, since it's a little known fact outside of this place, that we were the fictional home office of the David Letterman Top Ten List for many years:

Top Ten FUN Things to Do in Oklahomo:
(drum roll, please)

10. Sit around and make fun of funny sounding Canadians.
09. Drink 3.2% alcohol beer, it's all you can buy cold (or reasonably priced).
08. Try to find five preset radio stations that aren't "All Country... All the Time..."
07. Prep lectures in Theatre History.
06. Take Wingo Superstar for walks around campus at night.
05. Avoid the urge to say "buuks" instead of "books."
04. Hang out at work-call and make theatre with majors, minors, and interested folks...
03. Explore new music online since I don't have a lot going on to keep me away from home.
02. Enjoy the eye candy (boy, is it nice to be back on a university campus...)
01. Enjoying my new job at Northeastern State University!

Music... for the people...

2006-08-25T10:41:00.000-04:00
I'm really digging last.fm. My buddy Captain Whiffle introduced me to it on his recent drive-through trip last week. Social Music Revolution... I'm so excited to hear good, new music.

The Ball is Rolling...

2006-08-23T12:39:00.000-04:00

I'm up and running this semester - like a chicken with my head cut off. Sometimes I feel like I've maxed out my credit card at a place like this. I'm excited for the challenge of designing learning outcome assignments, and I'm excited about the amount of available technology here for classroom (and personal use), but I'm also a bit overwhelmed with everything going on. Blogging here (instead of over at live-journal) will take some getting used to, but I'll be happier here, I believe. At least being centralized here will help? Although I have lots of difficulties with the whole blogger/beta switch over... some blogs are here at blogger, some are in beta. I'd like to condense and put them all on the beta site - which will happen in time. Looking forward to a weekend and a chance to sleep... something that's not happening a whole lot here, at the present time. Also, once I get internet established at home (on Tuesday), I'll be back to my old-blogging-self...

New favorites? :: Last.fm and allmusic.com (thanks Captain Whiffle) -- and also for www.fluxblog.org (damn, great music downloads there!) :: I'm also learning the intricacies of Blackboard for classes. Fascinating...

Gotta go change into clothes for acting class...

2006-08-21T01:55:00.000-04:00
My new icon. Photoshop exploration on a Sunday morning. I think it's pretty hip. Tomorrow it begins. I'm excited to learn and share with these new students. It's going to be quite a fun semester...

Pray for peace,
brake for dogs.

NAMASTE

2006-08-20T02:54:00.000-04:00
Notice the cool shower curtain behind my friend Johnna?

2006-08-19T13:05:00.000-04:00

I just realized that buying music, at least in my current situation, is like playing the lottery. While I can go buy stuff that people are listening to that clicks my clock, I'm chosing to actually learn about music - and to learn what it is that my ears like - and then, like my visits to the whole foods/organic grocery store to nourish my body - go and buy hip, classy, refined tunes for my ears. I'm done listening to crap. Taking suggestions...

These are my feet. I have a conjoined toe. Which is cool - mainly because it's not a conjoined twin.

Dr. Student

2006-08-17T15:26:00.000-04:00
So today I went to navigate the library, the net building, and to find my department secretary's office. I'm completely set up now for net services here at NSU and I've got Blackboard access, as well as many ILLs coming my way.

However, four times today I was given very strange looks (and one, "really?") when I identified myself as faculty and not a student. While my attire (tye-dyed shirt, shorts, tevas, backpack, and iPod) might have attributed to this conclusion a little - I can't believe that it's the only reason. Do I really look that young?

Lunch consisted of a fresh organic greens salad with organic feta cheese, salt, pepper, and a delicious organic tomato. Yum... Now back to my regularly scheduled day of syllabi preparation.

Throwin' Darts

2006-08-16T19:14:00.000-04:00
I'm continually fascinated with my new life. Today I was sitting in the bowels of the Shawnee Street Theatre with my colleagues to collectively scope out what our semester was going to look like - production, coursework, meeting times, festival stuff, that sort of thing. It ended up being a great meeting - although my mental capacities were already pushing maximum density - and I'm really going to like being here. It occured to me, out of the clear blue just how quickly my entire life has changed. After the meeting, I had no choice but to come home and take a nap, making this perhaps my third or fourth nap of the year - I just don't nap very often. I awoke very fresh - with exciting text messages waiting from my buddy Captain Whiffle who is road-tripping with his buddy from Austin, TX to Becket, MA with a twenty-six foot U-Haul truck. I'm now off to write syllabi, unless I'm distracted by all the eye candy foot traffic outside my apartment.

Greetings & Salutations

2006-08-15T22:01:00.000-04:00

Winter Poem
-- Nikki Giovanni

once a snowflake fell
on my brow and i loved
it so much and i kissed
it and it was happy and called its cousins
and brothers and a web
of snow engulfed me then
i reached to love them all
and i squeezed them and they became
a spring rain and i stood perfectly
still and was a flower